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Women are the creators of language. I’ve read that in my studies. It makes sense to me. They are the ones who bore the children and communication was necessary to keep the little creatures alive. 😊 And as we all know, for the most part, women are the ones wanting and giving constant conversation to everything. Communication is important in every area of our lives. Communication is necessary professionally, personally and globally. We can color with our words. We can lift a person up with our words. We can create dramas and beauty and peace with our words. As a person speaks, our minds conjure up images. These images create feelings. We create joy or sadness with our words. I’m sure there is no argument about this.

There is a communication that is a regular part of society that is not necessary. In fact, it’s more harmful than one might think. Gossip. Gossip is out right dangerous. Gossip is not just idle chatter. It goes much deeper than that. In the community that I surround myself with, we understand that each of us gives off energy. We understand that all of life is made up of this energy. Plants, animals, humans and all of matter is made of the same energy that we give off. This energy is tangible. Around each of us there is an aura. This aura is created by us and it ripples out to our surroundings. To gossip, means to create a negative energy about someone. When we speak this negative stuff, we actually put a vibration out into the world that can affect that person. All of us can ‘feel’ when we are being talked about in a negative way. Even if we do not have proof, we instinctively or energetically know that we have been the target of unwanted conversation. Images have been conjured up and the ripple of energy has expanded outward and it does harm as we ‘feel’ the consequences of such conversation.

Over the years and years of being made to feel as though what women say is unimportant, many women have learned to talk more about others than to speak on matters that are inspiring and useful. Sure, it can be blamed on the millennia of patriarchy oppression of women’s worth, but I would much rather say that it is simply time to recognize how harmful gossip is. We are easy to say that for children and teens, bullying is harmful. Yet, we fail to realize that the vibration and actualization given off by gossip is equal to if not worse than bullying. And this is not just a women issue. Men are equal in the gossip area. Peer pressure doesn’t stop after high school. It is easy for some people to just get caught up in the gossip that permeates our conversations. I’m sure no one really means any harm. My wish for you is that you don’t get caught up in conversations that don’t ‘feel’ right. Attributed to Ram Dass are words that changed my life forever. He said, “Before you speak, ask yourself. Is it necessary? Is it true? Is it kind? And, is it better than the silence?”

As a counselor and life coach, I get to witness first hand the damage that gossip can to do a person. In a summer that is so abundant with beautiful color, warm weather and ocean breezes, I choose to have my conversations about life and the inspirations that move me and others forward in a positive way. Let nature teach you how to share the good stuff and in this way, we begin to create better and more peaceful habits.

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